"Wait, we can refuse service?!" #Starbucks, probably. #SarahSanders #RedHen
19:56:12 96 018
Miter
Sionic Fork
The next step in over-complicated eating has arrived...you're welcome. Say dinner is served and you want to amp up the cuisine. The home chef removes the Sionic forks from their charging station and you prepare to dine as royalty...assuming they as well have Sionic forks.

Here's a brief notation on cooking. Heat accelerates molecules in the food, changing the density and composure of the material to make it more edible..and deader. Microwave ovens use a method of dielectric heating to accomplish this task more efficiently.

Meanwhile, once disengaged from their charging station, and no larger than a vibrating toothbrush, you puncture the flesh of the deceased animal or vegetable corpse, causing the pressure sensor to briefly (1.5-2 seconds) activate the servo which pulses the head of the fork lodged in the ruffage, exciting the molecules.

Elsewhere, your fingers are pressed on the handle of the fork in a comfortable ergonomic position to your gaping maw which puts the ionic action into, um...action. The already prancing about molecules are then further enticed as the soon to be poo reaches your taste buds in a now even higher explosion of taste.

But wait, there is more. When the Sionic fork is set on the table, it's rested on the Sionic 'heating plate' (rechargeable in stack) that gradually warms the head of the two pronged fork, giving each bite an internal temperature of yum.


Project 47 Subway Flyers (Coming Soon)
Who's to blame? Why, you are!

As our society descends into chaos from a lack of sustainable chaos challenging our innate masculinity, the delicate constitutions of others has established allowances for absolute imbecility. From etiquette to culture to character, what was once intolerable is now barriered by margins of inappropriateness to discuss.

Project 47 would like to offer our most sincere screw that by posting these (and more) flyers initially throughout the New York Metropolitan Subway system in the coming weeks. Stay abreast of our Twitter feed for live updates and photographs as they occur. #changetheworld



[Update] Two more flyers have been added, bring the total to six.


Pet Door Brush (Updated)



[Update] Yowza! When engineering a new project, we are often quite liberal about researching existing materials before moving forward and (ungracefully) while we disagree with their particular methodology, we will surrender that this (currently unavailable) one slipped through the cracks. [dogdoorgenie.com]

[Update Part Deux] Ours is better. If anyone wants it, we demand 23.75 per cent and our services labelled, Analogue Anatomical Contortion Deviation Toilance. It's rubber, genius.
In The Meantime, Sandwich Recipe #4
As we fester here in this pre-#Project47 lunch break limbo, why not have a Tv's #4 sandwich on me; layered as described.

Sheepherder's Bread Slice
French's Yellow Mustard
Shredded Cheddar Cheese
Oregano
Basil
Marjoram
Garlic Salt
Black Pepper
Turkey Ham Slices
Minced Garlic
Olive Oil
Sliced Cherry Tomatoes
Diced White Onion
Romaine Lettuce (Marinate in Orange Juice)
Shredded Parmesan Cheese
1000 Islands Dressing
Sheepherder's Bread Slice
Shower Valve (1)
The notion behind this shower valve concept are based on aesthetics for the male velocity enraged enthusiast and space efficiency. Nearly all have at least once, more commonly frequently, elbowed the jutting shower handle which either annoyed you, drastically altered the temperature or broke. Pay no mind to the detail, it's conceptual. [Engineering > Shower Valve (1)]
Brainwashing #1
We are temporarily (archetypal) initiating a new series here on tvmiller.com where we harken back to our original commentary series, but abridge it into a sole thought-of-the-day.

Episode #1 Environment Dictates?

Here's a bit of a quandary. Washington D.C., New York City and Chicago are perceived as representations of capitals of the United States of America and even deemed capitals of the world in a similar manner. There is, however, a slight burden with these environments representative of America.

(To note, Los Angeles has been excluded because the "entertainment capital of the world" denomination has done very little to entitle California to hold an overwhelming bearing on legislative matters, especially since Northern and Southern are so drastically divided fundamentally.)

The national demographic of the United States of America as of last year was:
64% White 16% Hispanic 13% Black 5% Asian

Washington D.C.
50% Black (+37) 30% White (-34) 9% Hispanic (-7) 4% Asian (-1)
New York City
33% White (-31) 29% Hispanic (+13) 23% Black (+10) 13% Asian (+8)
Chicago
33% Black (+20) 32% White (-32) 28% Hispanic (+12) 6% Asian (+1)

How is it that the nation's most governing environments are polar opposites of the make up of the country itself? Another notion can be proposed to contend a flaw in our fragmentation and sympathy for culture by reviewing the top 5 most dangerous cities in America demographically.

#5 Memphis
62% Black (+49) 29% White (-35) 5% Hispanic (-11) 1% Asian (-4)
#4 New Haven
43% White (-21) 37% Black (+24) 9% Hispanic (-7) 0% Asian (-5)
#3 St. Louis
49% Black (+36) 44% White (-20) 4% Hispanic (-15) 3% Asian (-2)
#2 Detroit
82% Black (+68) 10% White (-54) 7% Hispanic (-9) 0% Asian (-5)
#1 Flint
53% Black (+40) 41% White (-23) 3% Hispanic (-13) 0% Asian (-5)

Cultures are on their own accord to afford themselves better opportunities, the very element that gave whites evolutionary headway on this new continent. We should be willing to askew our unavailing emotions and observe reality, in that some cultures have demonstrated an inability (ref. Africa#Economy) to subsist under their own merit. This can further be demonstrated in the contrasting safest cities list.

#3 Honolulu
55% Asian (+39) 30% White (-34) 20% Black(?) (+7) 3% Hispanic (-13)
(?) 20% makes little sense in that the form also states 8% Pacific Islander.
Only 8%, on a Pacific island?
#2 Portland
79% White (+15) 9% Hispanic (-7) 8% Black (-5) 8% Asian (+3)
#1 Plano
78% White (+14) 10% Hispanic (-6) 10% Asian (+5) 5% Black (-8)

Call a spade a spade and be more functionally observant and acknowledge openly that a spade may be the very problem. The gamut of evolution is fair play. If oppression is your view of a catalyst, recognize that being oppressed is as well a failing. Comparatively, Jews hardly fell victim to such a hindered growth following emancipation (ref. Exodus and Canaan) or perhaps more relatively, the independance of America.

The environmental characteristics we live within today is a trend that has bled into our infrastructure and has now spoiled due to Caucasians being unchallenged. That however, is for another cleansing.
Intellectual Fish Kit
Feed someone and tomorrow they will starve.
Clothe someone and next season they will shiver.
The missing abstract from charity in the third world is the lack of the development of core fundamentals...you know, like how to subsist. Normally I would reason, let them wither away because clearly, after 400,000 years of human evolution, if you don't fucking get it by now, you're just an oxygen filter.

The alternative is taking keynotes from evolution and attempting to advance these cultures by utilizing the very basic apparatus of contemplation and communication. This is why we have brought back the Intellectual Fish Kit (#ifk).

The premise is simple, provide the tools for every individual to create and wisdom will pursue. Something as simple as a student preserving notes that he or she can look back upon to the complexity of a man in sub-Saharan Africa notating the gradient of a slope which leads to a hydration system, describing it to another who advances the idea, the notes preserved and dispersed, evolution befalling. All done by supplies we find littered in large bins at a Dollar Tree.
In due time, we will petition you to travel to your local bargain outlet and purchase these specific goods (1), package them as described (2), write a note of your name or merely a best wishes and then send them to a specific distribution hub (3) that will then apportion them to regions around the world that are in desperate need of human acumen. Then you will have the confidence in knowing that you ably lent a hand in not simply feeding or clothing a child but creating the means for an individual to survive on their own in the same merits that you do, wit.

Stay tuned for more on this project as it develops. If you would like to donate to this project so that we can expedite the creation of our distribution hub, please send a request to mvt@tvmiller.com.

[#ifk]
Simple Text Captcha Form Javascript
Web developers come in two degrees, expert and someone who creates a jackball website because they have some resemblance of a life to apply it to. When this delusional idiot decides to do something complicated, he turns to the experts and finds out that they have no skill what-so-ever at lending primitive advice. This, is one of those fuck simple solutions to escape the need for understanding the physics behind a bowel movement.

After employing a simple query form without CAPTCHA, you've almost certainly received an assheap of spam from bots or real vaginal swabs of people sitting in a chair unable to perceive tit depth. Side note, you fuckers should die...and I mean that in a good way.

Searching the internet for a solution, you will come across several "easy to install" CAPTCHA scripts that end up requiring AJAX, PHP, PERL or something other language you only know in yes or no form. "It's just a simple fucking email form, why do I need a whole 'nother page to get this done," you wonder through spittle at your screen.

Here is the ridiculously simple alternative (ver. 1 of 2) to creating an extra level of deterrence to the spammer. The version below draws information from Date() and prints a frequently changing math equation that the form user simply solves and moves on. If they enter the wrong solution, a warning appears and until the answer is correct, they're fucked.

The second version (not posted due to bugs) utilizes a more complex random() algorithm that I just don't want to fuck with, but you get the idea. This one is just fine for creating an extra firewall between asshole and function. Enjoy and remember to name your first born after me...after I've died.

<script language="javascript" type="text/javascript">
function validateForm()
{
var d = new Date();
var x=document.forms["formname"]["security"].value
if (x != d.getUTCDate() + d.getUTCHours())
{
alert("Security Answer Failed");
return false;
}}
</script>

<form name="formname" action="form.php" method="POST" onsubmit="return validateForm()">

<script type="text/javascript">
var d = new Date();
document.write(d.getUTCDate());
</script> + <script type="text/javascript">
var d = new Date();
document.write(d.getUTCHours());
</script> = <input type="text" size="1" name="security" onclick="this.value='';" value="?">

Demo
+ =

DIY NYC Backpack Scythes (ver. 1.01)
If you were to examine the brain of an obese person, you'd likely find (an official Tv Miller theory) that her (her, referencing this heifer that just placed her enormous grizzly bear paw on my electrical cord, crushing the material on an atomic scale) amygdala is disfigured by either genetic malformation or through trauma, thus eschewing nominal personal space perimeters.

Observe a complacent occupant of Manhattan (the most densely populated city in North America) and you will discover the same deformation. The personal space of an individual from this region is subsequently vastly smaller and more invasive to those who have a more nominal point of reference.

This is where our intolerance comes in.

Supplement an inability to contrive spatial recognition, strategic movement or accountability for behavior (cellphone primacy) and you have a sidewalk littered with the discombobulated journeying scatter-shot.

Collisions are frequent. Efficiency is negated. Inconsideration for itinerant SOP is all but disregarded.

No longer has been such in our path, and today we have elevated our response to further combat the unapologetically ignorant.

Behold, with the charms of ancient warfare, four #10 3/4" wood screws embedded very easily by puncturing the material, creating a scythed backpack. Should you aspire to invade our personal space amidst an inappropriate maneuver, you will undergo an "abrasive episode".
 
But wait, there is more. We are at present configuring a circuit to allow an electrical current to flow to the metal screws and emit a trifling discharge to the perpetrator. Stay tuned for that.

Engineering > Engineering Dump > DIY NYC Backpack Scythes (ver. 1.01)
Ball Busters "Last Chance"
14:00 198 (17-Jul)
New York Softball League (Sunday)
Steal Team 6 (4-1) v. Ball Busters (1-4)
Randall's Island Field 22

Current Standings (Miller, Tv)
No.
17
Player
Miller, Tv
G
1
2
AB
4
8
R
3
6
H
1
2
2B
1*
1|1
3B
0
2
HR
1
1
RBI
3
3
BB
0
0
SO
0
0
SB
0
0
AVG
0.750
0.875
OBP
0.750
0.875

*Ground rule double.