"Wait, we can refuse service?!" #Starbucks, probably. #SarahSanders #RedHen
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Peak Roller Coaster
As Project 47 is reigned in closer, we have begun drafting numerous projects currently delayed and/or in long term development, as a means of record. This several year old roller coaster concept titled "Peak" reaches many new heights in thrills and other fay effigies.

Constructed into a fabricated mountain spire, this high speed coaster's marquee attribute is the peak departing world's highest vertical loop. At ground level, the themed inclined queue mimics a base camp that leads the rider up the slope to a boarding tent. The car then travels along the face of and throughout the mountain and is hurried towards the peak using a drive tire slope that releases back into the mountain and then out into the vertical loop. The car then scrapes the face of the mountain, once again returning inside for a conclusive vertical loop which exits from the interior and returns the car to the 'base camp'.

This project is currently delayed for obvious reasons however, we look forward to an opportunity in the future to reimagine this concept for real application. Further images are available at Engineering > Peak Roller Coaster
Why Not? DIY Tracheotomy Flower Pot
Are you a repulsive rag who's corrupted your meager existence and those around you by being a nerveless pansy? I can tell, seeing as you likely obtained that tracheotomy by doing what simple camping taught you was unhealthy, not inhaling smoke. Now you're frightening the children with your supplemental orifice and robotic discourse, so let's spruce up your decayed visage with a DIY tracheotomy flower pot.

Visit your local flower shop, purchase an aqua tube and sever the end, then treat your cancerous throat like the inside of a VW Beetle. Furthermore, when you have finally succumbed to your inbred stupidity, the in-coffin flower arrangement could be exquisite.

Engineering > Engineering Dump
VibraFingerBall Thing?
Titles of projects have always perplexed us and following the FleshliPad "incident", it is especially difficult to comprise an applicable nonclementure, unless overstating the obvious. This is our third of apparently an eventual fourth sex toy, once again for the ladies, that we have blatantly titled, Finger Ball Vibrator. Venture a guess as to it's application? [Dimensions: 1.5" diameter / 0.7" aperture]

Engineering > Finger Ball Vibrator
Those Guys MPW 2nd Annual Zoogz Rift Memorial Elimination Match

Special thanks to Christopher Wiley and Brett Walters
Those Guys Sandbox
Following the Those Guys pharaohic announcement that rivals Mikey O'Shea and Extreme Loco would have to tag together against BPW Tag Team Champions, the Suburban Commandos, Extreme Loco responded from 1998 with a cathartic refusal. Those Guys reresponded when Furious took Tv to the park as reward for getting a good grade in arithmetic.

20:00 PST 147|072
Battleground Professional Wrestling
3252 Florista Street
Los Alamitos, California 90720

Happy Everybody Draw Mohammed Day III
Those Guys in the BPW Clouds
Why Not? II - Square Toilet Seat
The next time you look down upon your toilet, ponder who's anus is that immense that it inspired this archaic design? I dare say even Rosie O'Donnell's is not as cavernous.

Recently we demonstrated a healthy alternative to our existing throne however, one would argue that with millions of porcelain bowls mounted the world over, perhaps an initial notion is asking, why are these shapes so inefficient?

At this very moment, run your finger across your anus. It's the size of a novelty button. Your urethra, whether an inside out or outside in version, is just mere inches north and yet the average toilet seat aperture diameter is nearly 8 inches across.

Enter a public restroom and a prerequisite faced is sanitation. A toilet napkin is oddly shaped and often times useless. When unavailable, you're sequestered to layering strips of toilet paper in an octagonal pattern. Either is wasteful and inefficient.

So, why not a square toilet seat? In public, two direct strips complete the task or a toilet seat cover designed with less excess. At home, the sheer dynamic discourages a seat down male urinationist.

Perhaps comfort is then your quandary? How many circular chairs have you sat upon today? None?! Exactly. Immediately cease thinking for yourself because you have performed poorly and instead, allow me to ask, why not?

[ref. Engineering > Engineering Dump]
Those Guys - MPW (133/072) Who's To Blame?
Hellkid...Hellkid is to blame. Since being cut off by Furious George week in and week in two, Tv asked the fans to vote on Those Guys' next entrance theme. Unfortunately, now number one contender Hellkid presumed Team Hellkid had no need for such #shenanigans. Pft, what does he know...pft. Regardlesslyness, rugged sex symbols Those Guys unreadily came to the ring at Millennium Pro Wrestling in Simi Valley to a tremendous uproar.

After dominating Team Vandal, Those Guys guy Furious George was exhumed from the ring and heinously attacked by members of the Architects of Anarchy including even by means of the now infamous lollipop'ing incident that left an unconscious and bloodied Furious stumbling into the back having absolutely nothing to do with a moonsault from the top to the outside by Tv. Not in any shape, way or form...besides, say that it did. What, are ginger skulls filled with marmalade and wrapped with cellophane?!

This accumulation of shenanigans led to Those Guys, Crayz and Frankie D to be disqualified from the Zoogz Rift Eight Man Tag Elimination and Potato Salad Match. Rumor has it that MPW will give Those Guys a chance at corn syrupy redemption on 30-June when MPW returns to Simi Valley. Stay tuned.
Those Guys - MPW 133/072
This Saturday, Those Guys are once again dusted off and ripped from their packages for yet another play-date with the schlubs of Millennium Pro Wrestling in Simi Valley and in what has already heralded a good deal of shenanigans from booking, Those Guys join Hellkid, The Spectre, Crayz, Frankie Dee, Fern Owens and Hed Zeppelin in the 2nd Annual Zoogz Rift Memorial Eight Man Tag Elimination Match and Buffet for a shot at the MPW Championship which will be decided later that night between Bo Cooper (c) and former WWF'r Gangrel. While Tv has already begun celebrating his sudden and certain championship title match, he took time to remember the little folk that watched him get there by pointing them out in the crowd on busy thoroughfares and gesturing you're number one from the middle of me. Unfellow Those Guys guy, zoo occupant and docent Furious George however, has only stated that he 'can't read'. Perhaps it was 'didn't read', we can't be sure, but what we can be sure of are gophers and this statement from state registered Those Guys guy Mor who was reported as saying,
"Neither Vig or Furious have discussed the possibility of being the final competitors left in the ring because we all agreed Vig will likely be eliminated early on. Mor is speaking."

In other news, it was agreed to several months ago when Furious and Tv discovered their (paid for) allegiance that Tv was to have one-hundred-per-cent control over determining their entrance theme. Previous incarnations have included Baywatch, Mr. Belvedere and Christina Aguilera's Genie in a Bottle. Each and every time, Furious George has last minute vetoed Tv's trenchant selection so this week, Tv has come to you to sway his decision on the next Those Guys entrance theme for this Saturday at MPW. This poll will close at 19:00 PST this Saturday before doors open. [ref. http://poll.fm/3p1al]

Show your Those Guys support by tweeting #shenanigans on Twitter and/or by following Tv on Twitter @TvMiller. Those Guys apparel will be debuted at MPW and available for purchase soon. Stay tuned.